||[Oct. 7th, 2003|09:37 am]
Feeling Sorry For Myself
|||||"Hello" - Evanescence||]|
I have been a burden on people for a few years now. A couple of back injuries and a driving phobia have pretty much made me very dependent on a good many people. MOST appear to genuinely like to help as best they can but others appear to enjoy keeping "score". That's fine. I love to help others whether I "owe" them or not, I just don't have a scorekeeper. But what happens when someone that has been helping you when they can gets into a situation that they could really use some assistance and you're the last on the list? They will take help from everyone else on their friend schedule and then gripe at you for wanting to help and it's not convenient for them. I made a special effort to set-up with someone a day and time that I would dedicate to assisting them. Basically be a house bitch, that's cool, I cook decently. :::munch munch::: (eating halloween punkin cannies). I know this time is about them and their emotional and physicl pain but I thought I would be needed when the time arose. Guess not.
I'm relegated to the lowest rung of the people ladder destined to look up at everyone's asses. Just do me a favor, wear underwear.